i don't hate americans. i really, really don't. in fact, i enjoy some of their company. i've had quite a bit of fun with some females during our american tour, and don't get me wrong, while the female gender is exotically merchant to my needs -- the males have also proven to be a fancy. but you know what i hate? american holidays. no this is not because i am on a power trip where i believe that australian holidays are better, but because some of the american holidays justify for some pretty great things. you get lots of days off from school, there are more presents involved, and sometimes you get to just stuff your face with food. which leads me to my coming rant about the following holiday american's get to experience: thanksgiving.
1. eat as much food as possible. the reason i say this is because i myself enjoy food to the greatest of all things, and would be pleased to hear grant that you stuffed your plate to the rim and devoured whatever was on there and though of me all the while. you should not let such a free holiday go to waste with petty diets, but instead embellish in the richness of free food. my favourite as of now is pumpkin pie and also anita enjoys mashed potatoes. i think the mere suggestion that she would adore you for doing it is enough to motivate you all.
2. don't be a bitch. spend time with your family. the one thing that i regret when i'm on the road is that i don't get to be with my mum half the time that i would be able to even if i had a normal lifestyle. she's dear to my heart, and also my daughter of course, the both of them remain without me when i have to be on the road and its tough shite when i miss them. i can't do anything about it. but if you're able to go home for the holidays, then do it. don't let some man and/or woman seduce you to comfort instead of heading to the lovely adobe of home. flick them the birdy and tell them up yours, because your mum has got some hot chocolate waiting for you.
3. help cook said food. pick up some pointers. i tried this once at a family dinner with one of my mum's exhusbands and i learned how to make the meanest macaroni and cheese on the planet. now jules and alfie know that when they are craving for some cheese not directly from a can or powdered substance, they can just holler toward the talest boy in soundwave and ask for a pick me up. griffin's way is the only way to go with macaroni and queso.
4. do the shopping the next day. i have never heard of anythign cheaper than the day after thanksgiving. you have discounts that make your mother cry. although it may be a bitch to get up so early in the morning, when you're at home celebrating i imagine that its a good feeling. you've got all your knicks and knacks and you don't have to worry about getting someone's present late anymore because you've got it right there. its all available. ALSO BUY ME THINGS. BUY ME EVERYTHING. BUY OUR CDS. BUY AN IPOD TO PUT OUR MUSIC INTO. BUY ANITA TOYS. BUY JULES SO COOL HEADPHONES. GET ALFIE AN ELECTRONIC DOG!!
5. ALSO DID I MENTION, EAT AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE?
and that would be all for today, although you must all know the good news that has put me in such a high spirit. anita is officially, anita julianne griffin and no longer going by the surname of her mother. she has finally lost the battle and i could not be happier in my life than i am now. i have two of the best bandmates in the world, and in the most amazing band because of them and its like feeling boundless, free of borders, and on top of the world.
when i first started touring with jules and alfie, i didn't think there would be as much work as i have put into the years. there were always little mishaps and happenings when we would be on the road, and in the beginning, when we didn't have a tour bus and lived in a van, it was hard living with alfie and some of his tendencies. to begin with, have you ever tried to live with two boys that would, every night lets say, perform on stage and gather up sweat that is unimaginably smelly? well okay imagine that and the nagging of alfie who, alteriory, would not like this sweat. we would have to find some place to stop so the boy could shower while jules would mull around and hang by the snack machines and ultimately, get all the sweets he could get his little paws on. don't get me wrong, i loved this. we were in a new city almost every night and meeting people of different places, faces, and backgrounds. i loved the seconds that i got to spend with these two boys, but after a while hygienics, bad habits, and other shite would get to the best of me. i like to complain sometimes, but i also mediate. i would sit back and observe as alfie and jules tried to open a bottle of olives because they both weighed, at the moment, under 120 pounds. (i was always the one that had to watch out for the heavy things for they could barely lift their own weight.) no day passed by 
where i wouldn't have stains on my tshirt (and no i don't mean this in the rhetorical pop star diva way, ashlee simpson wanna bes) perhaps a rip in my jeans, or smelling like some other sort of food. jules was always ready to drink, alfie was always ready to sleep, and i was always ready to just walk away. i still love them, i've always loved them. i will always love them, but sometimes? its like touring with anita, of course, full grown walking, singing, and mean music playing machines. (i can only imagine what soundweave will be like.)
touring. (perhaps every day for the rest of her life is i can get her away from lena.) well living with anita is sort of easy because i was prepared for it. the best training of all if you ever want to have kids?? living with jules and alfie. i don't get mad or irritated when she puts a little throw up on my shirt cos i've have jules barf all over my shirt before, and my lap as well. some of it may have just gotten in my mouth as well. i don't mind when she throws toys at my face, or pinches my cheeks, or bites my fingers cos along the way, alfie has done those things. (he's also pulled my hair when we're sleeping only because he says its comforting??) my daughter does not though 1) commit bro rape or 2) is addicted to porn. so those are traits alfie and jules possess all by their selves. (although i am no saint.) she does though, 1) enjoy the good sound of music, 2) likes pawing the guitars. she also likes to coo to our songs, and i think thats something that every father wants to hear. (that is if you are part of a worldly known band.) she is well on her way to becoming the first established member of soundweave. i am sure that alfie and jules will find a way to give her a drummer, and a vocalist very soon. (or she'll be mad at uncle alfs and uncle ju) speaking of good music, i think lately we've been walking on cloud nine with the awards we got at the aria's. alfie was jumping off the roof and i think that was the highlight of the week all in itself. the way he's been lately, i just don't like it. so the revival of him, and the smile?? brilliance. jules is heading to the US soon and i won't tell him to his face but yeah i'll miss him. i am going to have to find other means to entertain myself because spending time with a little baby, well its fun, but she can't talk back.